That’s a book written by a couple – he’s Quebecois and she perhaps English but they wrote this book looking at the differences between France and North America.
The Bonjour Effect is what I have told you before. You simply MUST say Bonjour before interacting with a French person. I know yet I still forget sometimes by starting with Excusez-moi. Nope. And I even heard a French person say Excusez-moi and once she had the attention of the other person, she then said Bonjour.
I thought it would be interesting to see what the French people think of the book so I lent my copy to one of my friends. At our next meeting he said he now understands me!
I guess he hasn’t always approved of my interaction with waiters. Hey. I am NOT rude. I smile. I say please and thank you. But apparently I am not deferential enough. Say what? And he said that – you think it is their job and they should wait on you and take your order and check back etc. Ah? Duh?
I still don’t get quite what the French think about this – it’s almost like they have to convince the waiters that you are worthy of their attention.
Speaking of waiters – my friend and I were having a wonderful Italian meal at Fuix by the Luxembourg gardens. We sat in the enclosed patio with the heaters because inside was suffocatingly hot. The waitress was not attentive. Pas du tout. I think we asked for the water three times. Oh well. It’s Paris. Then a group of students (the university is close by) came in – maybe 10? They were loud and obnoxious and there, I thought, went our nice lunch experience. They started to move tables together to be able to sit as one. Loudly.
And then the mean waitress came out. Oh my did she give them what for. Who were they to come in and rearrange the tables? They were disturbing her clients (us! She was defending US!). And they could just leave, thank you very much. The students argued. She held her ground. And they left. She rearranged the tables back to normal, shrugged her shoulders, smiled at us and went inside to continue to ignore us.
My friend suggested that in fact the students would only have ordered a café and would have taken a lot of her time and energy for not much return. So get out